I HAVE ISSUES

Okay…..where to start. I have to get this exercising in. Must trim off the fat and weight. Stretching….that’s a good place to begin. I slowly raise my arms, stretch stretch stretch. That wasn’t so bad now...try the right leg. Bring it up to chest…..made it half way but the roll on my belly stops me from going further. Inspired that I don’t have to go that far, I try the raising the left knee. Nope, it didn’t fare any better. Okay, I know where the work has to take place. I was full stretched out and all warmed up (it felt hot in here) I decide to attack the dreaded belly. That of course means working the abs. Except I don’t appear to have any. How stupid is that I ask!! How can you work something that you don’t even have??? Okay…I will sit down and cool off while pondering this dilemma.

While sitting, I see my desk has accumulated a few items which do not belong. I blame these errant articles for the disarray which is sprawled over the top. I wonder who put all that crap on here? I look around to find the offender but sadly I realize there is no one there and he/she isn’t likely to show up as I live alone. So I have to make a decision. Back to my work out or clean the desk.

I thought about my problem. If I leave my desk this messy, will I be able to do a proper work out while thinking about the chaos which is reigning by the computer. And if I do my cleaning up, will I ever find those lost stomach muscles which everyone tells me is somewhere in there? These questions!!! They must be answered. I figure the fat around my middle will have to forgive me for not attempting to shed it with a vigorous and diligent workout. The desk wins….

I spot a couple of envelopes. Empty. I guess I could put them in the recycle. I get up and take them to the bin. Ooops. It’s full. Another chore that no one around here wants to do. Since I was doing something to get out of something, I had better take care of it. Into a bag it goes and put it by the door so I will remember to haul it out when I go out. Back to the desk. I find a package of gum I thought I had lost, two pens, a notepad with last weeks grocery list which I forgot when I went to the store. Reading it I realize I missed half the stuff on it. Still don’t have the things on it so I must not have needed them as badly as I thought. Okay….list is in the garbage. Wait…better take it out and make a new list in case. Make new list….throw old one out.

Phone rings…answer it. Hey a girlfriend I haven’t heard from for a couple of months. What am I doing…just finished working out and was cleaning up around here. Lunch…sure…meet you in an hour….

Problems solved!!!!