TALK TALK TALK

This is ME

2009-05-06T12:09:00.000-07:00

SORRY EVERYONE

2009-05-01T18:32:00.000-07:00

I am going through a little bit of a depression right now. Work and the Union are taking up the rest. I just don't have the strength to blog or think after work and with my mood lately, it is probably better that I don't. I will keep reading posts so I can stay up with everyone. Missing you all...take care....I'll get back when I can.

CONFESSION #2

2009-04-23T15:39:00.000-07:00

TAGGED FOR 8

2009-04-19T14:23:00.001-07:00

Lana from “The Kids Did What” tagged me after getting tagged herself from Little miss Sunshine

8 Things I am looking forward to...

* Lana getting her own place (you begged me to say that)
* Getting a visit from my boyfriend (he’s in NZ)
* Going to visit my boyfriend
* Watching my team win the Stanley Cup (Canucks)
* Getting a visit from my boyfriend
* Buying a new car
* Spending the millions I am going to win in the lottery
* Getting a visit from my boyfriend

8 Things I did yesterday...

* Ordered Pizza
* Babysat
* Ate Lana’s donuts
* Talked to Boyfriend
* Watched my sink getting fixed (big leak)
* Watched Hockey
* Tidied up
* Laundry

8 Things I wish I could do...

* Win the lottery (back off Lana)
* Sing
* Do Magic (real real magic – like Genie)
* Get a visit from my boyfriend
* Quit working
* make everyone I love healthy and happy
* wake up in the morning 30 pounds lighter (gotta go with Lana on this one)
* Go visit my boyfriend in NZ

8 Shows I watch...

* Hockey (Canucks)
* Poker (any)
* Hockey (More Canucks)
* Home Improvement Shows
* Baseball (The Jays but have gotten away from it a little)
* Hockey (without the Canucks)
* Golf
* Hockey (WHL)

8 People I tag...

Not tagging anyone. Play if you like….

MOTTO

2009-04-16T09:00:00.000-07:00

A Paper Me and Milk Chocolate VLOG!

2009-04-14T00:03:00.000-07:00

My daughter Lana and I wanted to be "with the times", so we went ahead and did a vlog together. Before this one, we did 4 or 5 "practice runs". While I preferred this one, Lana liked one of our "rough copies" which you can see on her blog The Kids Did WHAT?! Like the vlog at her blog, we may not make a lot of sense as we were giggling like nervous school girls. But we wanted to say hello and show our faces... sort of... Without further ado, Here we are:

(Forgive the low quality sound.)

Your turn!! :)

BIGGEST ONE I HAVE EVER SEEN

2009-04-11T18:19:00.000-07:00

Well ... for all of you who love Give-Aways...here is the link to the biggest one I have ever seen. And the prizes are to die for. Dawn will be happy to see you and to tell you all about it. Go check it out at Bee & Rose

POLE DANCING CLASSES

2009-04-11T01:29:00.000-07:00

Well Ladies, I did it. I actually went off with my eldest daughter and we did it. Pole Dancing!!!! YUP….you heard me. Pole Dancing. I have no idea if you know what it all about but let me tell you one thing. It isn’t all that you think it is.

We had to sign a waiver. One that said if we hurt ourselves it is our own fault and neither myself or my next of kin could sue. That should have been my first clue. I had rather graphic thoughts of leaping up onto a pole and having it break with my weight, falling through the floor boards and landing in the basement. This, however, and I am pleased to announce, did not happen. Amazingly enough.

I should actually tell you a bit about myself as I failed to do this in the past. I am a 56 year old grandmother of 9. I am not in as good a shape as I should be and I pack around a good 30+ pounds extra. Mostly belly fat. I also am not as physically strong as I should be either. Let me just say this. When the urge to workout strikes me, I usually sit down and eat chocolate until the urge passes. That said I will continue my story.

The ladies at the center were really wonderful. They took the time to show us what the program was all about and offered some great advice on how to get through it. And then we started. First we walked in a big circle while stretching out or in my case finding muscles. Then we were on mats on the floor finding more muscles. A half hour later we were warmed up. That should have been my second clue. How can pole dancing be that strenuous that one would have to warm up for that long? We stretched and we rolled and we pushed every part of our bodies up and down all while trying to do a sexy walk and running our hands over our bodies. Then we got to go to the poles. Okay….here comes the sexy stuff I thought. NOPE… I would be wrong again. Believe me when I tell you that there is nothing about it that is sexy. I just looked like an overweight seal trying to move around something in the way. I am positive I couldn’t and wouldn’t have “turned on” the seal either. Talk about awkward. I was assured that it would come with practice though and if tonight didn’t kill me, maybe I will get better. After about 20 minutes trying to do unnatural acts on a pole, it was time to take on the wall. Yup….you heard me….dancing with a wall. I do have to say that using a solid item like a pole and a wall has its advantages though. They held me up!!!

We did this wall thing and then back down on the floor and the mats to wind down but it was worse than the warm up. And those ladies…let me tell you they didn’t leave one body part alone. They worked every inch and every muscle in our bodies. It was really hard work but fun.

I can see the advantages of doing this work out and believe me, if I can move tomorrow I will be doing it again. I just have to wait and see if I survived this marathon I feel I have just completed. All in all, it was really fun and later when I learn to move properly it will be a sexy addition. Hey… who doesn’t want sexy….Right!!!

A GOOD LAUGH

2009-04-10T11:11:00.000-07:00

Yesterday my 7 year old grand son was showing his mother and me, his "wounds". He had band aids on both of his knees. He raised his pants well over his knees to show us and there on the left side of his thigh was a huge ugly bruise. His mother asked him where he got it and his reply....WAIT FOR IT..... As he pointed to the band aid on his knee and said...."It came with this one!"

I almost peed with laughter. What?? They obviously come in pairs. It was perfectly logical to him.

How To Fix the Economy?

2009-04-08T11:42:00.000-07:00

This is how I would fix the American Economy

Dear Mr. Obama – President of the USA

These suggestions should fix your economic problem if followed correctly. This package will cost you 400 million dollars only.

You will need to pick 39 million working families who earn $35,000.00 per year or less. Pay them each $1 million a piece with these stipulations:

1) They leave their jobs. Thirty Ninety million job openings - Unemployment Fixed.

2) They buy NEW American cars. Thirty Ninety million cars ordered - Auto Industry Fixed.

3) They either buy a house or pay off their mortgage- Housing Crisis Fixed.

Send me One million dollars for fixing your problem.

All this and it's still cheaper than the "bailout"... all for a mere 400 Million

MORE CHOCOLATE

2009-04-05T19:33:00.000-07:00

BEFORE COMPUTERS

2009-04-02T21:58:00.001-07:00

YEAH YEAH

2009-03-31T09:18:00.000-07:00

Well...what can I say...GUILTY !!! My last post was for everyone to have a great weekend. Someone, and I won't name names, gently and nicely pointed out that the weekend was over. Such a subtle a unique reminder that I should have posted a new post by now. Thank You.

So...What did I do with my weekend. Well, mostly, I worked. 12 hour days or in my case, from 630 at night to 7 in the morning. Now before you gasp I will tell you that I like that shift. It is quiet and management is gone. I get lots of work done and have time to play a few computer games. Unfortunately there is no internet connection so I can't blog. I will have to see what I can do about that.

I finished work at 7 on Sunday morning so I had the rest of the day off. It was nice to lay around and watch some TV, listen to music, catch up on some commenting, have a nice long bath with candles, a couple of naps and a few other favorite hobbies. Just a quiet nice day which was most enjoyable. Of course the down side to doing only my favorite things on Sunday is that Monday comes around and all the chores need to be done. Wouldn't it be wonderful if everyday was a Sunday. Heck, I wouldn't even mind working.

What is your favorite day to relax?

GREAT WEEKEND

2009-03-27T12:25:00.001-07:00

NO SALE LADY....

2009-03-25T13:31:00.000-07:00

Well I think I have just met the most insistent saleswoman ever.

My eldest daughter and I were out thrift store shopping. She is learning ballroom dancing and needed some "eloquent" dresses to wear. You know the type...sexy at the top, often with beads and bangles, jewels and other such sparkly things that a magpie would love to have. The bottoms have the irregular hemline with lots of flowing soft material that swirls around. These dresses are not cheap so we hunt for them. BINGO....first store. There were lots of them BUT (and of course there is always a but) they were not in her size. She tried on about 5 or 6 and started getting discouraged. She is a tiny little thing compared to me and wears maybe a size 6 maybe 8 depending on the cut and the dress maker. Anyway, these were all WAY to big.

Enter helpful salesperson. "Oh" she said when we said they were too big on her. "I have one in the window that may fit." Off she went to get it. Now I know I checked the windows out and couldn't think of one dress that would be suitable for dance. Back she came with the dress. Now....I am trying to be nice here. Remember that as I tell the rest of this story. This dress was not only butt ugly, it probably was a size 20 and I am not exaggerating. It was browny/beige and looked somewhat like a sack. A big sack at that and something or someone had left a errant deposit upon it. I politely said "No" and put it on a rack and explained to her what we needed the dress for. She picked it off the rack and handed it back to me and said it might be worth trying on anyway. Again I said "No" and added my daughter was small and this dress was too big and put it back on the rack. Now she started to annoy me. She added that it could be tailored where upon I said "It is not right". It is the wrong color, the wrong size and was cotton. Cotton just doesn't swirl in dance." "No". She would not give up. She insisted that if we added some pleats at the waist we could get extra material for the dress to "swish". I am now giving up any hope of remaining civil. I said "No" probably a little louder than I wanted to. Hoping beyond anything that this woman would finally get the hint that this was one sale she wasn't going to make. NOPE. I was wrong. She said that if we took the dress, she would take 10% off the price since we would have to have it altered. I knew beyond a doubt I was going to get snippy if I opened my mouth for anything more than a "No". Soooooo, I bit my tongue, and said no and turned away.

Give up.....NO WAY ON EARTH WAS SHE QUITTING..... Faster than a cheetah after a gazelle she had that dress whipped off the rack and over to my daughters dressing room. She handed it to her saying "just try it on." Just like you did when your kids were 7 years old. Oooops....my daughter let out a squeal that would make a mother pig proud. "Mom, that is the UGLIEST dress ever" (cause she thought it was me that handed the dress in). I thought the poor woman was going to burst of embarrassment. Now if the dress had been the color of her face it might have had something going for it.

In retrospect, I know the woman was trying to help but got in the way and was trying so hard she forgot what we needed. I also don't blame her for trying to get the dress out of the door. It really was horrid. If I had owned the store it a) wouldn't have gotten through the door and b) would have made it out the door in the garbage can....immediately.

HELP HELP

2009-03-23T20:02:00.000-07:00

So far on my last post I have had 4 people "visiting" that are advertising on my blog. I deleted the comments and ads but can anyone tell me how to stop this from happening again?

Thanks

SUMMER, ORANGE AND DAUGHER

2009-03-23T18:35:00.000-07:00

Well I have had enough of winter, the cold and just blah days. I want warmth and sunshine and maybe a few palm trees. Ooops...got a little carried away there as we don't have them here. I will settle for flowers. Lots and lots of them in every color. Oh...and a hammock....like this

I can't see orange things without thinking of Yaya. I see stuff and think she would like that or wonder if she has one of those. Orange is going to drive me as I am a purple person....See what you have done? You owe me!!!!

My daughter...delightful child that she is, called me a sicko. (See Lana's blog). What kind of offspring calls their very own loving and devoted mother a sicko. I mean I am just devastated. Just like her cat is... WHEN WILL CHILDREN UNDERSTAND.
In fact I have decided to go and have some chocolate and if I gain weight...Boy are you ever in trouble for upsetting me girl..... (thanx for the excuse)

TO THOSE WHO BELIEVE IN ME

2009-03-21T07:02:00.000-07:00

This Blogging Business

2009-03-19T22:35:00.000-07:00

This blogging business is hard. I mean, like hard. As in difficult. How do you keep coming up with stuff to write about. Everyday life…..WHAT?? You want to be bored to tears maybe? My life is such that I often bore myself. As an example. Today I got to sit in a Union meeting for 8 hours and then had my taxes done. Ooooo…so exciting!! Now I get to play on the computer for a few hours. Oh and watch a hockey game.

Mind you I will write about 30 blogs of which I shall immediately erase cause they will so droll they will make me fall asleep. Face it…they bored me. So I will not burden you with that nonsense.

Maybe I could tell my fellow bloggers about the “dying” goat. Or about the day I spent getting rid of all my old paperwork. Nope. There are much better things to write about I said although I can’t think of any. Would they be interested in hearing about how big of a pot hole there was on the road and I damaged my rim and blew the tire out. Nah…. How about my first pet….a budge named Chipper. We had to give him away when we were moving. See boring. And before any of you bright-eyed bloggers out there think to help me….NO I WILL NOT WRITE ABOUT MY LOVE LIFE….. not that there is anything interesting in that either since we are so far apart.

Don’t give up on me though. I really will come through for you if you stick with me. Once my brain settles back to earth I will put out all the stops.

2009-03-17T07:41:00.000-07:00

2009-03-16T12:32:00.000-07:00

Today I went to my mailbox.

It was stuffed so full I could hardly get the stuff to come out. I noted the care in which the mail person put it in….NOT…. rammed in would be a better description. I tugged and pulled till I got a piece out and then…out came the rest onto the floor. My 7 year old grandson was with me so I had to keep my cuss words in my head although they desperately wanted to come out. He pitched in and started picking the papers and that is when I realized that most of the stuff from the box were flyers, Pizza coupons, furnace cleaning…you know the stuff. I threw about 80% of the stuff away into the bin we have next to the mailboxes. When I got home, I sorted the mail further. Would you believe me if I told you that out of that perfectly packed crushed up mail, I kept only one cheque (income tax rebate) and one bill that I have already paid. That was it!!!! Talk about a waste of trees.

Anybody else have issues with the amount of non-mail that is delivered?

2009-03-13T06:48:00.001-07:00

I WON.....

2009-03-11T00:38:00.000-07:00

Well bloggy friends...I won the election. woo-hoo.....and no that shouldn't be capitalized. I am STILL the President. Now I get to go on to bigger and better battles with the management. Not to worry though...I sorta like to fight with them. Cause I win there too. Maybe that's why no one wanted it. Cause I am doing such a bang up job everyone was scared to run against me...Yeah Yeah...THAT'S IT.... Anything or Anyone who tries to get me out of my delusional world will pay...you have been warned !!!!

BUSY BUSY

2009-03-09T23:00:00.000-07:00

Sorry bloggy friends…I have been very neglectful but haven’t meant to be. I have been very busy. I am the President of our local Union and have been busy trying to get elected again. …. Wait….that isn’t quite true. You see…We are a very small local. No one else really wanted the job. I mean really…no one wanted it, so to have a local and have some one represent them, I stepped into the position about 2 and half years ago and have been stuck….I mean I have been doing the job since. And even though there was no one else, we still, under the constitution, had to post election notices and everything. So I was campaigning like crazy trying to get some one else to step up to the plate. Alas I failed and am still doing the job. Am I to be congratulated??? That would be a big NAH…. I don’t mind doing it but it really is starting to take up a lot of my time that I would rather be doing other things. Like BLOGGING…

GOOD MONDAY ADVICE

2009-03-08T22:01:00.000-07:00

HOPE

2009-03-04T15:56:00.001-08:00

CONFESSION # 1

2009-03-03T08:32:00.000-08:00

I am about to make a confession. Embarrassing….not too bad but still. I can get into deeper transgressions later but for now, here goes.

I was just randomingly lurking when I read a blog that mentioned wrapping paper in the blog. My mind drifted to my stash.

You see…under my bed is a huge container of wrapping paper AND in my closet is another one. I swear I won’t buy any more until it’s gone but really. But then I wouldn’t get any new paper for 10, 20, 30 years. YES I have that much. In fact, I have told my 2 daughters, my mother and one sister NOT to buy paper. Come use mine. Help me I cried. They have come for the past 3 years and wrapped presents from my beloved paper. And trust me that with 9 grandchildren, lots of presents get wrapped, but the containers are still full.

I have an obsession . I recognize that I need to get my head straighten out on this one. So I am asking you these questions in hopes that your answers will lead me down a better path. My addiction depends on you. Here goes.

If you had a gift given to you this Christmas/Birthday/other occasion and next Christmas you got another one from the same person, wrapped in the same wrapping paper as the first one, (decorations and bows different) would you …..
a) Remember it was the same paper? and
b) Would you be insulted? and
c) Would you think the giver was a cheapo? and
d) Do you think I am going crazy?

I await your final verdict…

Morning Wishes

2009-03-03T07:34:00.001-08:00

Cleaning Poem

2009-02-28T15:27:00.000-08:00

Oh dear....I was just sent this on email from my sister-in-law. i have no idea where it originally came from or who wrote it BUT it is just too cute not to pass along. Enjoy !!!

I asked the Lord to tell me

Why my house is such a mess

He asked if I’d been computering

And I had to answer “Yes”.

He told me to get off my fanny

And tidy up the house.

And so I started cleaning up

The smudges off my mouse.

I wiped and shined the topside

That really did the trick…

I was just admiring my work

I didn’t mean to “click”.

But click I did and oops I found

A real absorbing site

That I go SO way into it

I was into it all night.

Nothing’s changed except my mouse

It’s very very shiny.

I guess my house will stay a mess…

While I sit here on my hiney.

WHERE IS SPRING?

2009-02-26T18:08:00.000-08:00

I yearn for the warming days of spring
The trees sprouting leaves of green
The tulips and daffodils give us hope
And brighten the long dreary scene.

Winter seems so endless
The short days seem so long
I want to see the sun shine bright
And hear the robins’ song

I long to feel the dark green grass
Beneath my warm bare feet
I want to look and see the flowers
Up and down the street

Where are you Spring
When will you come
To give us all the faintest hope
That winter is almost done

Sweet sunshine melt away the snow
Bring us the warm sweet air
That brings new life to all of us
Who linger in despair

Bring it now I beg of you
Come save us from the cold
Bring us all the warmth and joy
That winter came and stole

2009-02-24T19:41:00.001-08:00

LOOKING FOR SANITY IN LOVE

2009-02-23T22:13:00.000-08:00

You know…I have been thinking about this love thing a lot lately. What is it exactly? Is it that wonder feeling of caring so much for someone or is it a compelling feeling making a fool of yourself. I mean when does it become love. One day you like someone and the next you are a drooling imbecile who just wants to be with him/her. Your friends don’t like him/her. Your family thinks you have lost your marbles and you don’t think anything. You are just out there and I don’t mean out there I mean OUT THERE. Lost in your own little world with the object of your desire who now owns you body and soul. Or, everyone you know loves him/her and still you question it. Like, I have no idea what I did to deserve him/her.

We rarely accept that love happens. I mean really. Love HAPPENS…and then what? We have to work like little buggers to keep it going. WHAT??? We have poured our heart and souls into our mates and now we have to keep them interested. It’s true that they do as well but how, may I ask, did it just happen. Yeah yeah, I know…things didn’t just fall into place. We had to be out there looking for someone, or at least been open to an encounter.

You know I have a great idea. Why don’t we all have signs around out necks. They could say NOT AVAILABLE. Or AVAILABLE FOR TALL, DARK AND HANDSOME. Or….I MIGHT BE AVAILABLE IF…. You have the idea. How much simpler could it get. In the fine print there could be follow up instructions on how you expect to be treated or what you expect. Lists of likes and don’t likes. And don’t forget it should be honest and list all your/their good attributes and faults. And just as he/she is reading your little sign, you are reading his/hers. Then if they match up ….VOILA!!! (that means: expresses success or satisfaction. It would be the same (more or less) as saying in English "feast your eyes on this.") Or something like that anyway. Wouldn’t that be a whole lot easier than this “falling in Love thing”. And then take that “Falling in Love”. Why do we have to fall? Why aren’t we Lifted in Love?

Oh dear!!! I get in deep and I get weird. Maybe I will end this now while I appear to still have some sanity left. Too late you say? If you have any spare lucidness hanging around, send it on over….I obviously need it bad.

THIS IS MY PROTEST....

2009-02-22T18:21:00.001-08:00

SMOKING MAD

2009-02-15T12:24:00.000-08:00

Everybody I know is doing it and now I have this need to comply with the majority and do it to. It was the rage many years ago but somehow it got a reputation and now everyone not involved with doing it, avoids it like the plague. Come to think of it, a plague would be easier to get rid of than this scourge of society.

What the hell am I talking about…..SMOKING (or quitting in my case)

Now all the rage is to berate everything that has anything to do with smoking or people who do. One lady even suggested that when someone sees another with a cigarette, they were to go up and grab it out of their mouths. YEAH…..how would you like a fist in your face for your unsolicited effort. I suggested that when we see someone without a cigarette we should shove one in. How’d you like that Lady??? But all fun things aside…I have taken inspiration from my daughter and have decided to quit.

Ann Coulter, remember I wrote a blog on her and her stupid comments about single mothers? Well I have discovered that while I smoke I am still, according to that bimbo, a step or so higher than a single mother as far as taking down the mass general public. I took comfort in that fact but I know I was scraping the bottom of the excuse barrel with that one. Quit I must.

And talk about taking on a quest. No smoking and planning on losing weight at the same time. I figure every time I feel the need to smoke, I will just hop on the bike or the tread mill and work out. Are you laughing yet? Okay…the challenge is on. I know I can do this. I know I will live through it and I know I will be better for it.

As for my love life, I am working things out with HIM. It would appear that he was as unsure too not about me but himself. He is talking about coming in April maybe for 2 months. He doesn’t smoke either so he will be pleased to see that I don’t smoke anymore. And the loss of weight won’t hurt either.

Wish me luck and strength to endure. Pray I don’t feel the need to “kill” anything during my withdrawals. Thanks in advance for your support. I know you will be there my bloggy friends….

GIRLS IN MY CIRCLE

2009-02-11T22:59:00.000-08:00

I didn't write this, I wish I had. My sister sent it to me and I wanted to share it with all of you.

When I was little,
I used to believe in the concept of one best friend,
And then I started to become a woman.
And then I found out that if you allow your heart to open up,
God would show you the best in many friends

One friend is needed when you're going through things with your man.
Another friend is needed when you're going through things with your mom.
Another will sit beside you in the bleachers as you delight in your children and their activities.
Another when you want to shop, share, heal, hurt, joke, or just be.
One friend will say, 'Let's cry together,'
Another , 'Let's fight together,'
Another , 'Let's walk away together.'

One friend will meet your spiritual need,
Another your shoe fetish,
Another your love for movies,
Another will be with you in your season of confusion,
Another will be your clarifier,
Another the wind beneath your wings

But whatever their assignment in your life,
On whatever the occasion,
On whatever the day,
Or wherever you need them to meet you with their gym shoes on and hair pulled back,
Or to hold you back from making a complete fool of yourself .
Those are your best friends.

It may all be wrapped up in one woman, But for many, it's wrapped up in several..
One from 7th grade,
One from high school,
Several from the college years,
A couple from old jobs,
On some days your mother,
On some days your neighbor,
On others, your sisters,
And on some days, your daughters.

So whether they've been a friend for 20 minutes or 20+ years,
remember to tell them how important they are in your life. And also remember that God has placed them in your life to make a difference..

NOT SURE ABOUT THIS

2009-02-06T17:17:00.000-08:00

After posting that I have been in a long distance relationship, I got to wondering what the hell I was doing. I mean, I am at the mercy of the computer for communication and if that goes down … oh dear. On top of all of this, he is so much younger than I am and that leads to me wondering if it is working. Maybe I should start closer to the beginning and ending.

I met Paul (real name withheld) online. I had no idea how old he was but I guessed younger than me. At first he told me he was 35 but alas (or yippy) he is younger still. 31 to be exact…I am over 50. We talked for 8 months. Every single day for hours either by messenger or Skype. Then I flew to Australia and we met. He introduced me to some of his family and we stayed with them when we were in Sydney. He showed around and I have to admit that I fell hard. The age thing bothered me but not him. I stayed there for a month and loved it. In September, he came to Canada for a month. By this time I was gone…or at least my heart was but still wondering what this gorgeous thing was doing in my life and whether I really was what he wanted. I don’t know why I questioned it but I did but as all things seem to work themselves out, I have not heard from him since the 18^th of January. Leaving me to say that maybe he wasn’t as far gone about me as I was about him.

I know that both my girls will help me, and I know this because neither of them were exactly fond of him but kept their opinions mostly to themselves. But they will also help because I know they love me. That is why I have been depressed and not blogging much. I just don’t want to bring everyone down with me.

It must be over I say to myself but hope still lingers as I am trying to put my heart back in place. So with that I am trying to start again. Don’t worry about me…..and for the occasion I wrote a poem.

LIVING WITH TEARS IN MY EYES

He took my soul, my essence, my tomorrows

He left my heart

Aching and longing

Wondering what to do

Where to go

Filling with un-cried tears and love

That has no place to go.

My eyes are filled with tears and ready for release

I blink and prevent them from flowing

But one escapes and drips down my cheek

I catch it in my palm as it falls

And there in my hand I am looking at

A symbol of my sorrow

My heartache

My loss

My pain

My misery.

My eyes fill again

Never to be empty when I think of him

He is always on my mind

All that he meant to me.

All hopes for the future…gone

I will learn to live with tears in my eyes

And hope beyond hope

They will finally drown my heart.

BARBIES….NAH….

2009-01-30T22:16:00.000-08:00

All this blogging about Barbie dolls got me thinking. I never was one of “those” girls. Not that “those” girls are bad or anything. They just liked doing things that most girls wanted to do. I could never understand it. I was a tomboy.

I was outside most of the time running, playing batman, hide and seek, and beating up the boys. I was the fastest thing going. And I mean I really was fast. The boys I couldn’t beat up I could at least outrun. (don’t laugh, it saved my bacon a few times when I got cocky). It got so bad that I (in grade 7) took on a guy that was in grade 10. He had been particularly nasty to my older sister and then had the nerve to hang around our house. She had broken up with him and he made her cry. She had come home in tears and I guess he followed her and taunted her all the way back to the house. I put the run on him. I mean no one picked on my sisters except maybe me.

I never really started any fights but I was sure quick to end them. I hated bullies. They were my favorite to go after. There was just something that bothered me about someone who picked on another kid just because they were different or smaller. I would tuck them under my wing and it soon became known that I would indeed retaliate for any harm done to my “Protectee”. I actually had quite a following.

My Mother desperately tried everything to get me to settle down. It didn’t work. I was brought up to be independent and a free thinker. So once I had tasted that freedom it was highly unlikely that I was going to change. I tore more clothes than my other 3 sister put together. Grass stains, dirt and rips abounded. And fashion…what the heck was that??? I wore the most uncolored coordinated outfits imaginable. As long as I had a top and a bottom on and was covered…who cared was my thought. I found out many years later that my sisters didn’t like to be seen with me as they were afraid they may have to admit they knew me.

At age 17, I finally discovered boys and things changed. Well a little anyway, as I learned that if I just wore all black, everything matched. Easy and I didn’t have to fuss around with all those colored things and wonder. Sticking to the neutral palette works well for me and I know I can throw in one color and I am safe.

So Barbie was out for me…no top heavy, prissy, dress her up in ball gowns, rich, skinny Malibu babe was going to divert my attention. I wanted adventure, travel and fun things to do in real life. I have finally achieved most of what I dreamed of. Still a tomboy but with a feminine side but I don’t know where it came from. Perhaps some of what mother and the sisters told me really did rub off. Not much but enough to get me by. I think…..

I am a prison guard in an all male institution….You be the judge!!!

10 HONEST THINGS ABOUT MYSELF

2009-01-29T13:33:00.000-08:00

Over at the blog of Bee and Rose I was award the "Honest Scrap" award. Thank you!

Here are the rules for the award:

The honorees are to:

A) List 10 honest things about yourself - and make it interesting, even if you have to dig deep!

B) Pass the award on to 7 bloggers that you feel embody the spirit of the Honest Scrap

1. I eat too much of the wrong things. I know I should eat better but still don’t.

2. I don’t like giving up control.

3. I don’t work out as often as I should. I am lazy that way but I still expect results.

4. I am not fond of children…. I know I should be but I am not.

5. I have a long distance relationship. I am in Canada and he is in New Zealand.

6. I like younger men.

7. I am loud.

8. I dislike injustice and unfair practices.

9. When I think the truth will hurt a person, I will lie.

10. I don’t think I am very pretty.

Because I am still not too sure of my way around bloggy land, I am not going to tag anyone at this time.

Thanks again!!

CHOCOLATE AND ME

2009-01-28T17:54:00.000-08:00

Chocolate is a friend. Always there. Always ready to comfort me. Always satisfies and never ever gives me cause to be hurt or angry. Ready to come out of its hiding place without notice. Never questions my resolve to eat or not eat it. It just waits. No having to phone it to come out even at 2 am. No having worry about disturbing it. No wondering if I am causing it to change plans. Or find a sitter. Or make other arrangements. It is free to be there at my whim. My desire.

Ever since I can remember I have loved the sweet sensual taste, aromatic smell and the gorgeous silky texture of chocolate. I love the feeling of having a piece of it in my mouth, sucking on it and pressing it to the roof of my mouth and savoring a luscious thick chunk for as long as possible. With it stuck to the roof, I can brush my tongue up against it to generate a stronger flavor as needed and feel it melting and flooding my mouth with its delicious essence.

It makes me relax, gives me a time out and fills me with warmth. It restores me. It gives me the energy and necessary lift to go on. I crave it, yearn for it, need it, have to have it, want it, desire it, long for it, covet it, hunger after it, wish for it and nothing else will fulfill that craving once the thought has hit. It is in my life and will stay forever and I will enjoy it as much 10 or 20 years as I do now

I am going to go and find some of that wonderful stuff to help boost me out of this depression….. It is almost orgasmic….ummm SMOKE TIME !!!!

JUST A LITTLE DEPRESSED

2009-01-28T03:27:00.000-08:00

Again I sit in front of my computer and nothing is coming to mind to write about. I think I am in a little depression. Well maybe not depression but more like a recession. That seems to be the buzz word of the day. So like the whole world, I will have to bail myself out since the government is choosing to put it's money towards the economy instead of helping me.

There are a lot of reasons for me feeling the way I do. The News is terrible. My favorite hockey team is in a major slump. My boyfriend isn't talking to me. It's winter and I didn't win the lottery. There is more but the list would just keep going on. I think I just need a kick start up the ladder of reality and spring will be here soon enough.

I will go buy myself a big bunch of bright colored flowers. You know, I use to do that all the time but for some reason I stopped doing it. Fresh cut flowers seem to lift my spirits. The smell and the colors are so pretty. Then maybe I can write about something much more interesting.

In the interm, hang in there. My creative juices will flow again.

Thoughts of the Day

2009-01-26T13:06:00.000-08:00

Sorry fellow bloggers and visiting people...Don't have any.

That's just how it goes....some days genius and some days like this...Just a big old blank canvas waiting to be filled. What little brain cells I have left are obviously off working on another project or on vacation. They have no time at this moment for me. How rude of them to leave and not tell the boss. Come back i said...but they didn't listen. So i have spent the last hour staring at the monitor wondering what to write. NOTHING!!!! Not even a whisper or a clue. So here I sit ....clueless in Abby. Nothing is inspiring me. Can't even get an idea for a poem.

Bloggers Challenge me!!

MINDING MY OWN DAMM BUSINESS

2009-01-20T01:22:00.000-08:00

So here I sit…. I lost another argument.

It happened like this:

Me: I need some chocolate

Self: No you don’t

Me: Yes, I think I do

Self: You want it…You don’t need it

Me: One piece won’t hurt

Self: That’s the same argument you gave yesterday and then you ate 8

Me: I did not!!!

Self: Yup..pretty sure you did.

Me: Do you not have anything better to do than count how many chocolates I eat.

Self: You did ask for my help..

Me: Well I meant if I was to really go overboard

Self: 8 is overboard and you didn’t work out today or yesterday like you said you would

Me: Why don’t you go get busy counting my socks or something?

Self: Because you made me do that a week ago and the number hasn’t changed

Me: You are so self righteous…maybe if you had more chocolate you would be more understanding

Self: Look fat ass…you want to eat chocolate till you are a thousand pounds you go ahead. Just don’t be blaming me like you always do

Me: Well maybe you should be coming up with better arguments then

Self: Here we go again….It’s always my fault. You eat chocolate and then say I didn’t try hard enough to help.

Me: Well you let me down sometimes

Self: You are impossible. Now you have me thinking I need chocolate

Me: I’ll go get it…You wait here

Self: Yeah…and you’ll eat some in there while I’m not there to count

Me: Bitch

Help Me…I am a sick person!!!

PICK BACHELOR NUMBER NONE

2009-01-15T13:55:00.000-08:00

To Charmaine over at Middle Age Dating
I just couldn't resist...Sorry I need to learn how
to link posts...

Danger! Danger! Don’t pick him

His eyes look like he’s full of sin.

It’s not that he’s an ugly fellow

But why are his eyes red and yellow?

Discard! Discard! He’s turning blue

Wait could that be his new tattoo?

He’s hiding from the human race

By putting pictures across his face.

Oh No! Oh No! That’s not the one

He does look cute and lots of fun.

There’s no room for you upon the shelf

He obviously just loves himself!

Reject! Reject! This one looks bad

The worse one that you have ever had

He’s casual and so sublime

And just committed another crime!

Decline! Decline! His eyes are crossed

He sort of looks like he is lost.

He’s feet go one way, his head another

He’s looking for his long lost mother!

Oh Me, Oh My! Another choice

This one has a cracking voice

He’s too young for you it seems

The law says he must be sixteen!

I AM ANGRY......

2009-01-12T13:20:00.000-08:00

This morning I watched this video clip over at Stesha's Blog.

I AM ANGRY..... and so should a lot of other people be....I am speaking of this woman...this sanctimonious bitch named Ann Coulter. Can you imagine her saying that the reason for society’s failure is "the single mother". She obviously has no real reason for her stupid uninformed statements but has inserted her own personal opinion and needing someone to bear the blame. Her comments slam every single mother in the world. Not only single mothers who have had a child without being married but single mothers who have had their husbands killed overseas in a war. Single mothers who cannot tolerate being beaten or seeing their children abused, or decided they have had enough of the husbands cheating, lying or stealing etc.. Husbands who might have been junkies, murderers, thieves, gamblers or worse. Or why hubby left for a younger woman or decided he didn't want to be a father or just felt like he was being "cramped".

Just for the record, I am not a single mother. My children are grown up and on their own. My husband and I raised 2 lovely girls. If something had happened to him, I was not about to let my children be raised by anyone but myself. It is only by the grace of GOD that nothing happened and I didn’t have that role forced upon me.

Ann Coulter needs a reality check. She needs to listen to why some women are alone. Why they have chosen or been forced to raise a family alone. The question WHY begs to be answered...Why are single fathers praised while single mothers are a plague to society? Ms. Coulter is an ignorant self righteous cow that can no more relate to what is wrong with the country or the world than a blade a grass could to another cow. She blurts these words like they are a wisdom that should be obvious. She is the only one who has noticed this phenomenal occurrence between the downfalls of society and single mothers. She must have been studying this for all of about 10 minutes because there certainly wasn’t much thought put into it.

I am angry with you Ms. Coulter. I do believe I could never be associated with you as you have shown you callous stupidity to the world with your lack of compassion and understanding. People like you are a blight on a society that has enough problems without your type putting in your two cents worth of nothing.

THE ORANGE POEM

2009-01-08T20:52:00.000-08:00

In my "Purple" Post, "Yaya" made a comment and challenged me.

This is my response:

Orange is the color of the setting sun

We watch it in the light

We like the way it slowly falls

Into the dark of night.

Orange Marigolds line the garden walks

They cheer up our dreary day

They last so long and seem to glow

We wish that they could stay.

Fire flickers flames of Orange

Its embers glow the same

Never knowing that the joy it gives

Will ever more remain.

Some cats are Orange and lazy

As they sprawl and sit

The Orange goldfish just swim away

And they don’t care one bit.

Pumpkins lay out in the field

Ripe and Orange and bright

Waiting to be chosen for

One very special night.

Out of all the Orange things in the world

The one we like the best

Is Yaya’s hair and she thinks

Orange is better than the rest.

And since we all love Yaya

For her this Orange poem is penned

It’s all yours to sit and read

Over and over again.

THE COLOR PURPLE

2009-01-05T11:13:00.000-08:00

Just in case no one noticed from my blog, I like purple. I have a lot of purple in my life. To me it just is such a pretty color. It makes me happy to see it and sometimes I have to control myself not to buy something just because of the color.

This is one of my favorite poems about purple. Let me share. For those of you who have seen it, enjoy again and for those reading for the first time……I hope you like it.

Warning (also known as “The Purple Poem”)

When I am an old woman I shall wear purple
With a red hat which doesn't go, and doesn't suit me.
And I shall spend my pension on brandy and summer gloves
And satin sandals, and say we've no money for butter.
I shall sit down on the pavement when I'm tired
And gobble up samples in shops and press alarm bells
And run my stick along the public railings
And make up for the sobriety of my youth.
I shall go out in my slippers in the rain
And pick flowers in other people's gardens
And learn to spit.

You can wear terrible shirts and grow more fat
And eat three pounds of sausages at a go
Or only bread and pickle for a week
And hoard pens and pencils and beer mats and things in boxes.

But now we must have clothes that keep us dry
And pay our rent and not swear in the street
And set a good example for the children.
We must have friends to dinner and read the papers.

But maybe I ought to practice a little now?
So people who know me are not too shocked and surprised
When suddenly I am old, and start to wear purple.

by Jenny Joseph

I'm Trying Dammit

2009-01-04T17:07:00.000-08:00

I do try to blog often. It just doesn't work that way. I get a great idea but when I go to put it on paper, POOF....gone. Poor thing probably died of loneliness and left for better climes. You know....like the wind. Don't know where it went but gone just the same.

I have been reading many blogs done by you fabulous ladies. I have run the gambit of emotions over them. Laughed, cried, been made thoughtful and reflective and been thankful that I am not going through what some of you are. My heart and prayers go out to you all for sharing your lives. I can tell you something ....Are you listening cause this is important. Okay.....You may think your lives are mundane but they aren't!!!! The comments that others are making should tell you that. You think THEY would waste thier time if YOU weren't interesting....come on ladies. It is through your blog you share yourself, your life, your dreams and hopes, your families, your ideas and your love. To others You are the line between hope and despair. To still others YOU are an inspiration. Yes I said INSPIRATION....for example....because of you, I am going to try to be a better blogger in 2009. See ...inspiration!!! I do know what I am talking about here....

I know some of you think you are just "amusing" yourself. Just sorta putting down random day to day things. But to others it is truly sharing. Think about it....these strangers, these readers of your blogs, are in your life. They know a lot about you as a person, your likes and dislikes, your children, husband and whether or not you like cooking, horseback riding, painting and the list goes on. Someone out there needs to hear about the "crappy" day you had because they thought they were having one too. Then they realized they aren't out there alone. That life is sometimes not fair. That it can kick you one day and make you fly the next.

So ladies, back to that lost thought I couldn't find. I thank each and everyone of YOU for writing faithfully and openly. I will read and I will TRY to be a better blogger.

LISTS AND SUCH

2008-12-29T11:54:00.000-08:00

The Christmas rush is over and I find myself at a bit of a loss. Nothing to plan for and that sorta leaves me hanging. I don't know what to do. You see, I am a list maker....I make lists for everything. For example: Christmas dinner. Out comes the Excel Spread Sheet. Everything is put on that beautiful paper...who is coming, what they are bringing, when the turkey goes in the oven and when it comes out, what equipment is needed, and who is assigned to look after what. And on and on. My beautiful lists are kept upon my fridge to be followed by one and all. Maybe it's a little anal but it keeps me sane.

Till this Christmas !!

It started out right....then the powers that be said NUH AH! And the world went black...power out an hour after I put my beautiful turkey in the oven. Okay....don't panic....think....will wait for a bit and see what happens. About an hour later the power comes back on. Dinner will be a little late..not much though as I always have it out and done a little early. All is right with the world again and the festivities continue.

OH YEAH.....DREAM ON... a few hours later.....Guess What? The power goes off again. Now I have a half cooked turkey and it is getting late to call off the dinner. My mind is racing. Okay Plan C....take turkey to daughters house up the road and cook it there. No basting but the bird will survive. In the effort to remain positive, I reminded them that we will have hot food to eat while sitting in the dark.

The power came back about an hour before everyone arrived. This too was in doubt because of the big snow storm. We weren't sure if people were going to be able to even get here. There were several cancellations but I understand why. But those that braved the storm would be hungry and expecting a feast. Off goes the Ex to retrieve the offending (it is taking the blame for all the problems) and hopefully fully cooked bird.

Everything was set....People came and visited. A good time for all. More presents ripped open and people were laughing and enjoying themselves. Then everyone ate like there was no tomorrow and the turkey was perfect. And the food was gone in like ...20 minutes. ALL THAT FOR 20 MINUTES??? YUP!!!

We started the clean up and people started drifting out. THEN the power went out again...just as we were nearly finished cleaning up. It was so black in the hall. Some candles were found in a cupboard and we had to go rescue a three year old who was stuck on the potty. Bravo to her for not panicking.

Next year I put a contingency plan or two on my list.....

I HAVE ISSUES

2008-12-12T00:07:00.000-08:00

Okay…..where to start. I have to get this exercising in. Must trim off the fat and weight. Stretching….that’s a good place to begin. I slowly raise my arms, stretch stretch stretch. That wasn’t so bad now...try the right leg. Bring it up to chest…..made it half way but the roll on my belly stops me from going further. Inspired that I don’t have to go that far, I try the raising the left knee. Nope, it didn’t fare any better. Okay, I know where the work has to take place. I was full stretched out and all warmed up (it felt hot in here) I decide to attack the dreaded belly. That of course means working the abs. Except I don’t appear to have any. How stupid is that I ask!! How can you work something that you don’t even have??? Okay…I will sit down and cool off while pondering this dilemma.

While sitting, I see my desk has accumulated a few items which do not belong. I blame these errant articles for the disarray which is sprawled over the top. I wonder who put all that crap on here? I look around to find the offender but sadly I realize there is no one there and he/she isn’t likely to show up as I live alone. So I have to make a decision. Back to my work out or clean the desk.

I thought about my problem. If I leave my desk this messy, will I be able to do a proper work out while thinking about the chaos which is reigning by the computer. And if I do my cleaning up, will I ever find those lost stomach muscles which everyone tells me is somewhere in there? These questions!!! They must be answered. I figure the fat around my middle will have to forgive me for not attempting to shed it with a vigorous and diligent workout. The desk wins….

I spot a couple of envelopes. Empty. I guess I could put them in the recycle. I get up and take them to the bin. Ooops. It’s full. Another chore that no one around here wants to do. Since I was doing something to get out of something, I had better take care of it. Into a bag it goes and put it by the door so I will remember to haul it out when I go out. Back to the desk. I find a package of gum I thought I had lost, two pens, a notepad with last weeks grocery list which I forgot when I went to the store. Reading it I realize I missed half the stuff on it. Still don’t have the things on it so I must not have needed them as badly as I thought. Okay….list is in the garbage. Wait…better take it out and make a new list in case. Make new list….throw old one out.

Phone rings…answer it. Hey a girlfriend I haven’t heard from for a couple of months. What am I doing…just finished working out and was cleaning up around here. Lunch…sure…meet you in an hour….

Problems solved!!!!

Christmas Now and Then

2008-12-04T12:00:00.000-08:00

Today the kids want electronic games

Cell phone requests abound

Expensive clothes and pricey gear

The peace is never found

It seems these days we just spend

To have the perfect season

We’ll go in debt to get the things

But is that the proper reason

We need to take a look at what

Christmas really is

Family, sharing and lots of love

Friends and the birth of Jesus

What happened to the simpler times

When gifts were made with love

When a doll or truck was more than enough

Or a scarf, or a puzzle or gloves

Candles placed upon the tree

Lit with a magical glow

Childrens’ eyes shone just as bright

In the Christmases long long ago

Jesus, Santa and Children

2008-12-02T09:10:00.000-08:00

There comes a time in all of our lives when we stop believing in Santa, the Tooth Fairy and monsters under the bed. It seems these days children find out sooner rather than later about Santa and a piece of their short childhood is stripped a way. But I wonder…..is that because they are smarter and learn faster or is it because we let the proverbial cat out of the bag. Is it because it is easier for us to have them know the truth? We want to be the first to let our kids know and then we won’t have to pretend anymore? We can pump ourselves up and say we were always honest with our kids….but at what cost?

Children want to believe. I remember when a friend of mine told me there was no Santa. I was devastated. Of course I was home in a flash and asked my parents. My wise and gracious mother informed me that there really wasn’t a man dressed in a red and white suit but that Santa was a spirit of Christmas. She explained that giving was part of Christmas and remembering Jesus. That Jesus was born and gave his life for us. We celebrate his life and his death and by him doing so, he gave us the promise of ever lasting life so that we could give.

Jesus, our Lord and Savior, asks that we help our fellow man and walk in trust and love. He also asks that we receive that love. Santa asks that we be good and gives us things. When the time came and we found out that there really isn’t a Santa and we realized that our parents were giving us all the gifts, did any of us stop to say thank you to them? How many of us took the time to actually say, “Thanks Mom and Dad. You made my Christmases so memorable. I don’t know how you did it.” I know that I forgot to do that little thing.

My mom told me that by believing in Santa, we became better people. We give to others so they can learn what receiving was about. We weren’t to give so we could get a present back, but to give unselfishly. Like Santa and Jesus. They never get back nor could we afford the cost if the truth be known. Anyway, I believed in Santa for a few more years and never regretted it. I let my children decide for themselves whether the jolly old man was real or not, although I admit, I did everything I could to perpetuate that custom and I never actually said there wasn’t a real Santa. And now I get to do the whole thing over with my grand babies. Children and Christmas….what a match !!!

We get so caught up in the season and it often seems that it gets longer. The stores start so early with decorations, TV advertisements abound, the requests for donations for food banks, homeless, and other less fortunate folk, the so called obligations for gatherings and parties, the rush, the roar and the constant “Jingle Bells” playing in our ears.

BREATH….Breath long and deep. Exhale. This isn’t a race. There are no winners. This is Christmas…the most wonderful holiday in the year. We have to slow down and remember it isn’t the cost of the gift…..it’s the thought. And if it isn’t….it should be. We need to teach that to our children too.

So do yourself a couple of favors this year. Enjoy Christmas again. Make it really the season of peace and good will. Make things simpler. Find the beauty and reason for the season. Keep the secret of Santa from the kids. Let them share in the wonderful gift of childhood for as long as they can and share the story of Christ. I mean isn’t that what Christmas is all about…...sharing? Oh..... and if you are lucky enough to still have your parents around…..remember to thank them too.

Frost

2008-11-25T20:22:00.000-08:00

The morning frost lay on the ground

Like diamonds sparkling bright

Little gems of water blink

Beneath the pale sunlight.

It crunches below the running feet

Of children off to school

And melts under the warming sun

In tiny little pools.

There for a moment, then it’s gone

It fades in light of day

It brings the cold and makes us know

That winters on its way.

The Joy of My Mind

2008-11-16T22:02:00.000-08:00

I can’t remember not loving music. And before I go any further, I am not a musician. Oh I wanted to be. Didn’t we all have dreams like that once? Gigantic dreams of becoming a diva and travel to the corners world delighting the throngs of followers with our skill and talents. The crowds would be larger than any other performers. My clear precise voice would amaze and astound all that heard it. I even learned to play the guitar so I wouldn’t have to sing a cappella.

But in my car…that’s another story. My delusions of grandeur are at the top of the fantasy chart. I am invited by the best of the best to sing with them in concert. The likes of Garth Brooks, Anne Lennox, Enya and Queen. No genre is beyond my capacity. No note to high or long. I am a natural and they all want me with them. I make them look and sound good. Of course this takes all my time and with so many clamoring after me, I have to turn some offers down. Mostly the rappers as I am not as fond of their music as I am with some others. (and I don’t know the words). Yup….turned down….how will they manage?

When in my car, I practice. I tootle down the road with my CD or radio turned up and I belt it out at the top of my voice. (or no voice) The critics are amazed. I even get high praise and adulation from Simon. And we all know how hard that is, don’t we? The record labels are after me to sign a contract as I make them easy money. I am so good that when in the studio, my recordings take only one or two takes. Two only because I hear some small imperfection and although no one else does, I want it perfect. So we redo it, right this time. (back up CD player)

But having said all that, I do love music, even if I butcher it sometimes beyond recognition or am completely off key and can’t remember the words properly (that’s really when the retakes are done). I have fondness for soft easy listening songs that make my heart and mind think of love and romance. The songs that make your brain go off into dreamland for a few seconds. The ones where you can make your own videos in your head.

Music soothes me, makes me laugh, heals me, makes me happy, gives me strength, and lifts me up. It can also make me cry or be sad. Music reminds me of times that brought great joy into my life and also times of hurt and sorrow. Weddings, funerals, night clubs, birthdays, or simple gatherings around a campfire. No matter which emotions surface or how even how good or bad is associated with music we all have to admit that music is integral in our lives. Every store we go into, TV shows we watch, every school, any movie and come to think of it, every elevator. It is everywhere.

I have been known to sing around a campfire and with real people around. And what’s more….they didn’t leave. Major accomplishment…..(she said with her chest puffed out). And I admit that my neighbours may have to tolerate my showers. NO NO, I meant listening through the walls while I am in the shower singing. ALONE….I am quite alone…thank you for asking or assuming.

I couldn’t live without music in my life. It is as normal to listen and enjoy music as it is to breathe. I shall continue to boogie down the road with my tunes playing in my car and probably will be out of my reality world as I do it. So if you see me in my vehicle, lips moving and seemingly a little out of it, just leave me be. I am not swearing at you, just dancing in my head. I will come back to planet earth soon enough and deal with the real stuff when I get where I am going.

Alas… I will never sing quietly in the forest and have the little birds and new born baby animals swarming around me with enchantment and awe…oops….got a little carried away again.

Reality has to set in sometime...... la di la la...hummmm

WAR ON THE HOME FRONT

2008-11-12T14:27:00.000-08:00

When the men go off to war

The women often cry

They are the ones left behind

To and sit wonder why

They’re the ones that have to hold

The family as one

And wonder if it will still be whole

When the war is finally done

They hide their fears

They go to work and hold the line

They write letters to their men

They volunteer their time

They oversee the day to day

And hope things won’t go wrong

They think their man will be home soon

He won’t be gone for long

But things don’t always go as planned

In wartime people die

Some men come home without their limbs

Without their face or eyes

And while the men fight for peace

Women wait and hope and pray

Their men will somehow live

To come home another day.

Waiting For You

2008-11-07T09:25:00.000-08:00

Waiting For You

Alone

Yet not alone

Heart full of love and belief

Waiting for fulfillment

Wanting

And not having

Impatient with desire

The craving for loves touch

Wishing

Hoping for time to pass

Needing you near

Needing you to hold

Yearning

Heart aching with a hunger

Longing for you

Passion building

Silence

I wait in the quiet

For you to come

I know you love me

As I love you

Wonderful Women

2008-10-31T20:37:00.000-07:00

Reading other ladies blogs makes me wonder.

All the books and all the TV shows, never prepared anyone for such reality. It is true that as we live our lives, we are usually to busy to see small everyday things. Let me tell you...THESE LADIES see it all and tell it in their blog with humor and stories.

The ladies who blog on here are really REALLY living life as real people. They express their hopes, their love, their frustrations, their problems, tears, dreams, losses, going mad and laughter. Some talk about family, chairs, telephone calls, mistakes, pumpkins or any other subject that has entered their heads. Sometimes it's poop that brings out the inspiration for a story. They are talented enough to express all of the daily grinds in our busy lives. Today someone talks of children fighting and tomorrow it's a new dress they bought for an occasion. It simple doesn't matter. They have found an outlet to keep them sane while letting others know they are not alone in the world.

These remarkable women will never win a Pulitzer Prize for their creations but they should for being mothers and wives, for sharing, helping each other and for making it to the end of the day and starting again tomorrow morning......early. They should be place high in our regard. They should be honored for being everyday heroes who live the REAL life.

We as a society rarely think of any of these ladies as heroines. We think that a person who rushes into a burning building is a hero. Someone who rescues another is a hero. Someone who does a epic deed for the sake of another....

But lets face it. THEY are the ones who face each day with challenges that would overpower half the population of earth. They balance budgets (some better than others), they shop for the family, cook, and clean and are expected to do so. It's their job. Yet society often thinks little or nothing of their value. They are considered home makers. Unpaid, unskilled and unappreciated. And because they have no "paid" job, they usually aren't even entitled to have a credit card in their name unless the other half signs for them. Sad commentary but true.

Wait a cotton picking minute here!!! Unskilled??? They are nurses (unlicensed). They can kiss pain away or bribe it away with a band-aid (providing it has the right design on it....spiderman for the boys and princesses for the girls). They are chauffeurs, teachers, chefs, accountants and a myriad of other occupations depending on the day or the need. And some of these talented ladies work outside the home too.

And just when we think we have the role defined, they also turn out to be friends. They talk about real life so others won't feel alone. They tell their tales so others can see they aren't going through life alone and that the same crazy thing their kid did, yours will too. Moody some times, full of laughter at another. Mischievous, angry, heart warming or frustrated. They are lovers, fighters, and genuine people.

They give all they have to the ones they love. They worry over small details about their children growing up. They are a friend and partner to their mates. They care about others. They truly are heroine in their actions and their deeds.

I challenge everyone to read the blogs. They are amazing. They will make you laugh and cry. They will make your day and you will know at the end, exactly what I mean.

2008-10-23T22:27:00.000-07:00

Well, I am going to try this. I want to post my thoughts and poems and stories to see if they are enjoyed. Not the most original reason for doing it but an honest one. I will get to see the results and know whether to continue writing and posting or just write for myself.

So now I will go and pick through the piles of papers to find something suitable for print. Not that my work isn't suitable for family reading, it's just that I would like to present my first posting with one of my best. (personal opinions do count) Bear with me.

I will post new projects every week and check for comments.